A few days ago we talked about one of those teasing that some parents do not like to be done to our children: the one who jokes about a possible kidnapping of the younger brother. Today I want to give a little twist (more) to the subject, because following that post you commented on other heavy jokes that are made to children with the same grace (or misfortune) as the one commented.
So by boat soon there is a very, very popular one, which is similar to the one mentioned, because there is a kidnapping in between. In this case, the “joker” does not take a loved one from the child, but instead takes the child himself:
"Hi little one, how are you! Do you shake my hand?" - they usually say. Children who, poor little ones, trust even a thief, access and shake hands with the unknown person. At that time the "joker" should receive some kind of neuronal spark that makes him take confidence (the boy has shaken my hand and does not know me at all) and decides to start tightening the rope to see when it breaks continuing with his speech : "You come with me? Come on, come on, ”and slowly pulls the boy away from his parents.
At that moment the "joker" decides to put the icing on the cake and says: "Goodbye dad, goodbye mom", which is usually the time when the child starts crying at the idea that someone unknown separates him from his parents.
As you can see I have talked about a child who walks, however it does not have to be that way. The first time they made this "joke" to my son Jon, he was 8 months old and was in the arms of a neighbor who insisted on catching him (tell him not ...). After a while talking with us, at the time when the child should return, he decided to be funny and start with the "come, you come with me", "let's go" and "goodbye dad and mom."
In the middle of the appearance of the separation anguish, the child was disgusted "what for what." "Thank you - I thought - we leave the child calm in your arms and you return it to us broken."
From kidnapping to robbery with premeditation
But not all jokes are kidnapping. There are related to the art of stealing, like that situation in which a child is so calm playing with his toys and an adult appears in a bright mood and decides to take something away from the child: "this for me ... I take it that I also want to play". The child, defender of his most precious treasures like any neighbor's son (to see who is the fool who allows a stranger to catch something in his nose), starts to cry if he is small or refuses to resound if he has more skills communicative
The adult, then, usually returns the object to show the child that he was only cheating on him, although I believe that the child must understand that he returns it because he has complained. Some adults are satisfied because they have already done the grace but others, however, consider that they can still give more of themselves and then repeat the operation. The child's anger, of course, is usually increasing.
I have power, you are weak
Adults believe that we are more than children, simply because we have more experience than them. However, we are both children and adults and we both deserve the same respect.
There are people who do not have this very clear and try to show children that the world is a place for adults and that children do not really have a place, but live a transitory stage until they reach the goal: to be older. For it they establish this type of relationship in which they demonstrate their power: when I want I can take something away from you and harm you ... I can make you understand that I have the power to make you suffer and when you have understood it I show you that I also have the power to make you happy again. In the process, I also laugh at you (not with you).
Life is hard
Another reason for such jokes towards children is the Continuous desire of adults to show children, the sooner the better, that life is hard, that one does not always have what one wants and that here one comes, among many other things, to suffer.
It's not that it's not true, but I'm sorry, I can't agree with this stream of excessive realism that hurts children to learn. The problems come alone, they do not need to be invented, so as the child grows up and sees his own problems (and by the way he overcomes them, or not) he will learn what the society in which we live is like. Fucking a child while laughing at him is not educating him to learn anything, that is to say that adults sometimes behave like stupid people, using the innocence of children as a means to our entertainment.
Lack of communication strategies
I said it the other day and I repeat it. Many times there is no bad intention and these jokes are carried out simply as a repetition of a model of relationship between adult and child too established in our society. "As they did to me as a child, I repeat now that I am an adult" (of course how easily we forget how we felt when they laughed at us).
For these people with few communication resources who want to gain the attention of children there is a suggestion that usually works: do not make him angry and then approach him. Approach directly and period. Watch him play, talk to him about what he does. Explain that you also like to play, tell him how much you played when you were little and ask him if you can play with him. Most likely, he will accept you as a playmate and then make you a participant. If not, give it time. Another day will be. The friction makes the love, nothing else.
Photos | Ellyn, Allygirl520 on Flickr
In Babies and more | “Is this your little brother? Will I take it to my house? ”Laughing with them, not theirs
