Throughout several entries we have put our finger on the sore of a society that has created a model of maternity and paternity totally away from the needs of babies to the point of pushing us to have children, and then leave us alone (and many mothers they have a really bad time) and push the mother, the couple, to work again, to produce and consume again, and put aside the role of parents because that does not quote economically or socially (No woman is recognized in society who is a mother dedicated to her children and does not work).
Thus, we have managed to consider the most valid people those of working age, with experience, and who earn and spend money, and who are second-class citizens the rest: Babies, children, young people and the elderly after retirement, and sometimes even before, that many people of 50 years or more are left without work and there is no one to hire them.
In this social involution (which does not evolve) children and the elderly have been dismissed from families: the little ones to kindergartens, schools and extracurriculars and the elderly to live alone in their homes or in residences. How Pillar, which a few days ago he wrote a sad letter to a print medium (I don't know what it is, because what is shared is a photo) in which it highlighted what do you have with your 82 years, after a lifetime, and above all what does not have.
What I have and what I don'tThis letter represents the balance of my life. I am 82 years old, 4 children, 11 grandchildren, 2 great grandchildren and a room of 12 square meters. I no longer have my house or my beloved things, but whoever fixes my room, makes my food and bed, takes my tension and weighs me. I no longer have the laughter of my grandchildren, to see them grow, hug and fight; some come to see me every 15 days; others, every three or four months; others, never.
I no longer make croquettes or stuffed eggs or curls of minced meat or crochet. I still have hobbies to do and sudoku that entertain something.
I don't know how much I will have left, but I have to get used to this loneliness; I go to occupational therapy and I help those who are worse than I can, although I don't want to be too intimate: they disappear frequently.
They say life is getting longer and longer. For what? When I am alone, I can look at the photos of my family and some memories of home that I have brought. And that's it. I hope that the next generations will see that the family is formed to have a tomorrow (with the children) and pay our parents for the time they gave us when they raised us.
Pilar Fernández Sánchez. POMEGRANATE
If the word tribe makes you laugh, how about the word family?
A few months ago, when the deputy of the CUP Anna Gabriel He mentioned, when asked about it, that the model of society he liked most was the one in which the family faded into a tribe. Public opinion wanted to eat it alive.
It is clear that if that were a government proposal it would be almost unfeasible because of the current family philosophy, but no: it was just your personal opinion. And yet, at a time when we are very far from behaving like tribes, it seems quite clear that if we did our children would be happier, our elders would once again be the wise from whom everyone wants to learn and we, the adults, those who take care of the little ones, the older ones too, and the provision of food and media.
And no, it would not be necessary to go in loincloth, but simply create a community in which everything could flow collectively, and in which children and the elderly were as or more valuable than ourselves: because children are the energy, the light and the hope of a better future and deserve the best teachings, food and resources to develop physically and mentally; and because the elders have the experience, wisdom, patience, time and love to instill everything in the little ones.
Children and the elderly: the beginning and end of life
Already last year we showed you the beautiful project of the center Providence Mount St. Vincentin Seattle that It is a nursing home and nursery school at the same time, and where children with older people live in a relationship that seems destined to be a success.
What children can get with older people is amazing; With some exceptions, the elderly hold children in high regard: because they are pure, they are all energy and vitality, they are innocent, they are curious, they are love, and with them they feel they still have something to do. Something like explaining stories, jokes, sayings, stories and experiences. And that, without a doubt, gives them life. Because the important thing, as Pilar says in his letter, is not to add years to life, which is what medicine is responsible for, but of add life to the years, which is what happens when someone feels accompanied, loved and still with a mission. One, such as leaving part of his legacy to children.
And children have great esteem for elders because they have patience, because they have time for them, they look at them, they touch them, they talk to them, they listen to them, they teach them games, they share that time with them ... and that is a learning that is recorded forever: Has anyone forgotten the hours he spent as a child with his grandfather or grandmother?
Something we are doing very badly
Well, if we have not forgotten it, if we have not forgotten the hours that our grandparents gave us, if we have not forgotten the hours that our parents dedicated to caring for and loving us, why are there so many people like Pilar, who will no longer see their children grow up? grandchildren or great grandchildren because being alive, don't you see them?
We are doing something wrong if this is the future of our society; or if it is the present. Because we can understand that we have fallen into the trap of a capitalism in which adults live trapped in our jobs, with so many responsibilities and holes that we can hardly think of children or the elderly, but you cannot understand that we allow this to go further.
Years ago we should have made maternal casualties more comprehensive, and also paternal ones. Years ago we should have gotten a real reconciliation between family and work, in a country where the birth rate is very low and the policies to help families practically non-existent. For years we should have succeeded in getting young people, mostly unemployed (and those working on an unworthy salary), to think about forming a home and a family. Years ago we should have made the elders not be a scourge or feel useless, counting the days they have left in the solitude of a room in a place full of people older than gradually leaving.
But we have not succeeded, and at this rate we will get worse. What if we start thinking about what will become of us when we are those elders and we bring the generations that can contribute to each other a little closer together: children and the elderly? And if we begin to think that the important thing, what you eventually take with you are not things, but experiences, memories and the love of others?
